Monday, May 04, 2009

Let me see your sad face.

So you have probably seen the recent article on fish feeling pain, found by Cutthroat Stalker. And if you are cool, will have read Mr. Gracie's and Hoss's opinions on the subject.

Ok, let us say that fish feel pain, and react to it similar to the way we do, (minus the stupid facial expressions and constant whining). Something hurts them, they get scared. It makes sense, I get it. But unfortunately it won't help their situation. You know why? Because they're not cute.

If my mother's cats suddenly became slimy, scale covered, floppy tubes of meat with fins, she would scream and boot them out the front door to the coyotes before you could say "not very humanitarian behavior."

PETA wants to know why you would hook a fish, and not your dog. Well, your German Shepherd can sit, rollover, fetch, beg, and is way more fun to hang out with than a trout.

No one wants to cuddle with a fish, and society has taught me that means it is okay to temporarily inflict physical and possibly mental pain for my own pleasure.

If this news is a shock to you, and you feel bad about making fish uncomfortable, then sell your gear and go do something else. There will be more room for the rest of us.

-Alex who has been hooked in the lip, and understands that it hurts.


  1. You are on to something: the basic cuteness factor that determines the public response to so many things.
    Without that response mechanism, however, most of us would not have survived to adulthood - it is nature's way of making parents care for, rear, such little critters and eventually bring them to adulthood and they become us. All warm-blooded animals were cute at some point. Even Kyle and the Fat Guys. Your parents still think of you that way, cute, though you work hard to dispel that image.
    Fish, on the other hand are fascinating, beautiful creatures that can live in a fish tank, but are much better off in the wild - like a bird minus the cage - and we should probably do what we can to give them some exercise, at the end of our fly tackle, preferably.
    I can't speak for their psychic well-being (they will not tell me the silly little sausages) but I believe one of the beautiful sights in life is a fish jumping with a fly in his mouth.
    Secretly I believe the fish even like it, that is why they eat our pathetic imitations of their food.

  2. Anonymous9:07 AM


  3. Anonymous9:09 AM

    I don't think Kyle was ever cute, but I'll still drink beers with him.

  4. Anonymous9:17 AM

    People Eating Tasty Animals

  5. If it wasn't for those crazy Newfies bludgeoning the cute baby seals in front of photographers we might be able to legally obtain seal dubbing today.
    The very essence of "bad PR."

  6. I have heard that dolphin is tasty... too bad they are so damn smart and cute.

    Humanitarian "Hey, look at this poor dolphin caught in this net, lets help him out."

    Dolphin "Thanks dude, that's awesome of you!"

    Tuna "What about me?"

    Humanitarian "Fuck you, stupid tuna. Get in my sandwich."

  7. Now that's funny!

  8. I have cuddled with a fish before and trust me it isn't something anyone should do.

  9. I keep telling you to stay away from tequila... it makes a person do bad things.

  10. I have also heard it doesn't hurt them as much because they have a different nervous system than mammals. At least that is what I read in Joan Wulff's book?

    - Rogue Angel Kelley

  11. another good article for the readers-


What sayeth you?