We all know these people, and some of us see them every day in the mirror. In the world of fly fishing, who are you?
You only exist in the minds of others, therefore you are only as good of a fisherman as other people think you are.
It doesn’t matter what you are doing if no one is watching.
If no one is watching you might as well stay home and play with yourself and watch cable.
You fear looking stupid.
You are not mad that you went squirrel fishing and caught a tree, but you are mad because someone saw you do it.
The way your gear looks is almost more important than how it functions.
You spent 20 minutes sitting next to the river re-spooling your Orvis cause you never really intended to be seen using your $20 plastic back-up reel.
You have a fishing blog, which is set up with Google Analytics, so you can be sure people are actually looking at your posts.
You paid $50 for a SAGE sticker.
You have masturbated to a Trout Bum video.
You abide with the best of them.
Your gear works and that’s all that is important.
Your Scientific Angler floating like has become sinking tip, but that’s cool cause most of it still floats.
You have gone fishing and forgot your pole, but remembered the liquor.
You think paying $100 for a fishing vest is absurd. That’s what cargo pants are for.
You wear sandals.
Fishing is just another excuse for drinking outside. Catching a fish is a bonus.
You hemostats are “multi-purpose”.
You have referred to a fly you tied as “trippy”.
People think you are an asshole. You may or may not be, but you don’t care either way.
Your gear is very important and is kept clean and well oiled, but having the newest and most expensive and best looking stuff is not.
You mostly fish alone, not because you don’t have friends, but because you like it better that way. And you probably don’t have that many friends anyways. The ones you do have are most likely considered assholes too.
You are a good fisherman, and catch some real nice slabs. But no one has ever seen a photo of one.
You don’t get drunk while fishing, but you usually have a pocket flask filled with Scotch.
You fish every chance you get, in large part to get away from your wife.
The Computer Angler
It takes you less time to write a line of code than tie a surgeons knot.
You read every fly fishing blog, and are always up to date on news, flows, new tying patterns.
Like “The Show Off”, you also have a blog, but most of it is regurgitating news and videos from other sites. You are far too busy keeping up to date in the fly community to have an original thought about it.
Your blogroll is a novel.
You still live with your parents, and you do fish, but your allowance money is not enough to buy much equipment and your mom only lets you use the car for “important stuff”.
You sunburn easily.
The Intergalactic Oneness Seeker
You are not a human doing, or a human living, you are a human being…. Or some shit.
You think fishing is a peaceful, introspective practice and use the time to reflect on your life.
You are not very good at most sports, but you do like being outdoors.
You may have taken up fly fishing as suggestion from your therapist.
Not only do you pinch the barb, but you straighten the bend, so you don’t hurt the fish.
You chum with tofu.
You drive a Toyota hybrid.
Who am I missing?